optimistic,

hello daily readers. i promise i wont blog so longgg fr today. some things i wanna share, which is a lil bit of my relationship w Zai. i know th starting month fr us is still a honeymoon period. this wont go on any longer. i really wanted to ignore him when i met him after school today. know why? *(its a secret)* you wanna know, chat w me online. i was seriously pissed off when he told me about his past w this particular girl which i call pornstar. pukewakkk ! damn binget & so disappointed. why uh guys so th cibye? i should have found out myself earlier. haix. ARGHHH ! & then, when we were about to ride off to send me to jurong, th mom message. woahhh. so saket hati sak. i guess i shouldnt comeby anymore. it just seems to get tougher & tougher each day. i dont think im strong enough like i used to be to stand this kind of situation anymore. i wanna give up. b, if we were to break up, just remember i still love you. make your mom proud, not me. i tak kasi you tempat berteduh, makan & safety. its your family not me. i can bring you happiness & a shoulder to cry on, but i guess its Suzie she wants you to be w. i really wish to see you & her get back together. y'know why? cos being w me can go nowhere. shes much better than me, i know. i cant convince your mom. when i think thru what should i do to ensure your mom's satisfaction, i see nothing. i takleh menggaji like Suzie. cant read th ayat so well like she did till your mom tergiler-gilerkan dier. idk laah b. think thru ok? i dont mind getting hurt anymore, i just want people around my loved ones to be happy. thats th most important thing in my life. takecare at work. always lovin' you,